Maximizing the Power of your Network:
The Art and the Science of Building Relationships
August 23, 2007
By Raymond J. Arroyo and Dr. Joxel García
Text from a fortune cookie:" A smart person knows everything; a shrewd person knows everyone."
Effective networking is an important skill that is useful to individuals who wish to be successful and fulfilled. If staying connected with the right people and achieving success are important to you, investing wisely in building a strong network is just what the doctor ordered.
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines network as a usually informally interconnected group or association of persons (as friends or professional colleagues); an interconnected or interrelated chain, group, or system. We add that it is a close -- but not closed – network; a complex web of trusted individuals who are related in meaningful way and connected to each other directly or through the links of others in your network. A successful network creates advocacy for progress for its entire membership. Each member represents the other in absentia. The stronger your direct relationship with one individual, the more robust the individual’s links will be to you.
Do you remember the last time that you carved out a significant amount of time to assess the health status of personal relationships or to understand how effective your network may be? Are you spending an exorbitant amount of time managing your daily work and very little time nurturing your friends and colleagues or cultivating new relationships? The way in which you answered these questions may indicate your status as a social marketer – an important success prescription in your professional and personal life. But don’t despair or be discouraged: there is no better time than today to improve your condition. The prognosis is good, if you make a commitment to adhere to the recommendations herein.
A strong social network begins with you. You are the genesis and point of entry of any successful network that you enter. It is you and your actions that create the chain of events that will determine the success of any social relationship. Visualize it as an electromagnetic field: too much positive or negative charge will affect the outcome of the attraction. The success of a social networking relationship hinges on the efforts that you and your contacts put forward: too much negative force (lack of response or interest, poor manners, disrespect, etc.) will destroy it; too much “positive” interaction (too much talk about you, asking for but not giving, taking advantage of the relationship) will produce an equally damaging, and aversive reaction.
Therefore, to avoid either of these two extremes, the first step of the journey is to acquire a clear understanding of who you are. The goals of the person reflected in front of the mirror should be fully known. You need to look inside and articulate (to yourself) who you are, where you are in your passage and where you want to go. This first step is a crucial one in the long journey toward a successful networking life.
Strong networks create social capital, provide access to diverse skills and deliver strong influence without direct power. They facilitate the sharing of information and the exchange of ideas. They help rearrange business and social priorities. They determine, in large part, which products or services are launched, who will work with whom and establish mechanism for support beyond your own capabilities. Networks also deliver financially. They help develop a strong financial capital in the form of business opportunities, strong leads and rewarding careers.
Why then, are most of us not investing the time and effort to create a strong network? The task of rebuilding your network in the midst of the many intense demands these days is particularly difficult for many reasons, but they generally revolve around three key issues: lack of time, lack of skills, or lack of desire. Time constraints and demands are common to all of us and those who manage it best will most likely achieve higher degrees of success in the long term. Understanding short- and long-term time investments is crucial in order to appropriately prioritize our limited available time. The good news is that we all get the same allocation: 3,600 seconds per hour; 1,440 minutes per day; and 8,766 hours per year. What we do and how we spend each minute of every hour is what will ultimately make the difference in our lives and the lives of those in our network. Creating a simple plan is a start.
Developing an action plan begins by identifying your current network members and assessing their strengths and their gaps (and yours). The plan should include goals that are clear and measurable.As you work the plan, it is important to remember to use some basic “rules of the road”:
-
First impressions are important – Make a great first impression with every person you meet. Remember to smile often and freely, give a firm handshake, and maintain appropriate eye contact. Always be ready! First impressions happen unexpectedly and suddenly; the person you may by pass in the elevator might be the individual that you’re meeting for the first time later in the day.
-
Master the art of listening – Make a conscientious effort to refrain from telling your story. Listen. Actively listen by asking open-ended questions and don’t be tempted to interrupt to share a similar experience you may have had. Ask probing questions that demonstrate that you care. Be sincere. Learn people’s names and use them often.
-
Manage the gatekeeper artfully – Treat others as they want to be treated. Disregard titles and positions and treat everyone with the utmost respect. Be nice.
-
Reach out, proactively and constantly – Send a complimentary note to someone in your network who earned it and deserves it. Send a thank you card. Leave a voice message, with no expectation of it being returned. Spread your sincere, genuine good will and it will blossom. It will flourish in surprising ways.
-
Invite others out, informally and formally, particularly when you’re traveling to where they are.
-
Build it before you need it – Be proactive in building your network. Don’t wait until you need to look for a job to start calling your long-lost friends and colleagues. This is the recipe of disaster for your network.
-
Connect your network to others and help members in your network succeed.
-
Be prepared to repair it – Chances are whether warranted or not, a relationship will be weakened or damaged at some point on this journey. Take the high road and be ready to repair it, regardless of whose fault it may have been.
-
Don’t take your network for granted – Work at it. Make yourself a visible, valuable resource.
-
Ask not what the network can do for you, but what you can do for your network. The more energy and effort you put in the more positive outcomes you will harvest.
Networking is a product of successful communication. Sharing information among the members creates new possibilities. Lack of communication creates stagnation and the relationships tend to weaken and dissolve. Be proactive. Do not wait for the E-mail or phone call from that person you met recently. Take charge and communicate. Networking is mostly about being a resource for your own network and enthusiastically sharing your skills, contacts and experience. It’s about sharing your time selflessly.
How do you know if yours is working well? A network works effectively when there is a constant flow in information, ideas, and contacts among you and the people around you. When you’re meeting quality contacts who were brought your way by others in your network, and you, in turn, are taking the time to do the same for others.
In order to successfully grow your network, it is important to fully understand what you have to offer and what you need or would like to get from your new relationships (in that order). You may have access to general information, employment opportunities, real estate, publications, legal advice, financial acumen, business ventures, and more. You may need increased exposure, a trusted friend, an advisor, an infusion of capital for your business, a sounding board or a business partner whom you can trust or a thousand other things.
Over the next several months, this column will examine the critical skills required to make, nurture and grow your network that will result in increased influence, personal satisfaction, and a more fulfilled life.This column will address the following topics, under the name: “The Art and Science of:”
-
Saying no without feeling guilty
-
Making yourself an attractive network member
-
Speaking your mind with candor and respect
-
Honoring your commitments
-
Planning for the future
-
Brokering for your network
-
Being brief and polite
-
Listening, actively
-
Acting with sincerity
-
Putting your network first
If you’re interested in being a successful individual who gains the enthusiastic cooperation of peers and friends, in working collaboratively across different groups, departments, companies, or countries, in better leveraging your strengths and weaknesses, and in exponentially increasing your reach and access, we suggest that you reach out to your neglected colleagues to carefully and purposely begin to build the infrastructure of your network today.
Stay tuned for Babbalu’s monthly column “The Art & Science of…” on networking. Read it and apply its principles. It will be time well spent.
Raymond and Joxel
|
